A Guide to All the Feels and Learning How to Deal
This book was put in my cubby by one of my coworkers when it was still just an ARC about a year and a half ago, prior to its publication. I’m not sure if they were trying to send me a message, or if it was intended for me to pass along to my fangirl YA book club members, but either way, I’m glad to have been introduced to, and read, The Fangirl Life.
You’d probably know a “fangirl” when you see one, but the majority stay relatively closeted due to the stigma of being obsessed with fictional characters. However, these obsessions are sometimes the fangirl’s solutions for managing stress, anxiety, and even low self-esteem. Fangirling is often branded as behavior young women should outgrow and replace with more adult concerns. Written by a proud fangirl, The Fangirl Life is a witty testament to the belief that honoring your imagination can be congruous with good mental health, and it’s a guide to teach fangirls how to put their passion to use in their own lives.
The Fangirl Life encourages you to use an obsession not as a distraction from the anxieties of your life, but rather as a test lab for your own life story: How can a character girl crush be useful instead of a waste of time? How can writing fan fiction be a launching point for greater endeavors? How do you avoid the myths that fictional romance perpetuates?
By showing you how to translate obsession into personal accomplishment while affirming the quirky, endearing qualities of your fangirl nature, The Fangirl Life will help you become your own ultimate fangirl.
Before starting to read The Fangirl Life, I would have considered myself a mild fangirl – I have my fandoms, I’m a book hoarder, I make everyone I know read Throne of Glass, I love Downton Abbey and the Jazz Age, I adore Hermione Granger, I can quote Gilmore Girls like there’s no tomorrow, I have an extensive collection of Eeyore mugs, and I buy everything I can get my hands on that has to do with Peter Pan. But my fandoms have never gotten in the way of my personal relationships. If anything, they’ve allowed me to bond faster with people when I feel socially awkward or anxious or when trying to make a new friend. I created a book club for the sake of meeting new friends and shamelessly used my obsession with bound tomes to do so.
But as I was reading The Fangirl Life, I began to hate myself and went though a self-doubt crisis – what if everything that I thought was normal and healthy was actually really bad for me? Was I using fandoms as a ways to escape from my friends and family when I just needed some alone time? Was I using my love of Downton Abbey to convince my now husband to have a ’20s themed wedding against his will? Did collecting Eeyore mugs mean deep down I was gloomy and depressed? Was my love of Peter Pan indicative of my inability to mature and act like a responsible adult? Was the article I wrote about how I’m like Paris Geller more accurate than I let myself believe?
I guess that’s the problem with reading Self-Help books – unless you, or someone you love and care about, think you might need help, you don’t. Don’t try to fix what isn’t broken. Thankfully, I realized that Kathleen Smith was not judging me. She was not telling me I had a problem, or problems, as I had myself convinced, but that I should be mindful of when I am using them to escape from reality in an unhealthy way. I also realized, I’d never read a Self-Help book before and that if I really am tearing myself apart over one that doesn’t necessarily apply to me, I could probably do with reading a few to help bolster my self-esteem a bit.
Rating: 8 out of 10 stars